“If you’re a bird, then I’m a bird.”
“I knew, even then, how rare that kind of love is. Only the luckiest people get to experience it at all.”
–The Best of Me
There is always a since of wonder and jealousy that takes over when watching a classic love story. The passion, and heart of an old fashioned romance begins to intertwine within your own heart. The idea that someone could love you that deeply, and become intrigued by your mind and soul is thrilling. You begin to sit back and wonder, “where is this romance? Why haven’t I experienced? What happened to the love that our grandparents talked about?”
Then, you slowly begin to reflect on society. The norms, the common actions of today’s world. There isn’t any courting, because that means going out in public as an “item”, which will begin to raise suspension and you have to begin to verify that you two are “just talking.” And “just talking” gives way that you are still scoping out other people. There isn’t any concrete items until it becomes “official.”
Phone calls once a day or even a few times a week are definitely completely extinct. Immediate responses happen, every day, almost constantly. Sometimes there is some delay depending on work or school or something of that nature, but for the most part, you and your significant other are in constant contact.
No time to breath. No time to miss them. No time to build a trust.
That old fashioned romance has evolved into a new fashion, immediate sense of urgency.
So change that mindset. Slow down.
Develop into the idea that being able to text them all day is fabulous, but try to begin to pull away from that. Limit your talk to a phone call or even two over the course of the day. You will begin to truly miss that person, and you develop a conversation basis besides the usual filler of “wryd?” every 5 minutes when you run out of things to talk about. Enjoy your day and then relive it over the phone or in person. Bask in the idea that you can build a trust that is stronger than most in this day in age.
Take the time to truly learn someone. Go on adventures. Try not to stick to a schedule. Find time to have an intimate moment with them, not even a physical one, but a time to pick their brain, understand their heart. Forgive quickly and often and limit assumption. Old fashion love took time, and patience. A trust and belief that is was developed and that is something that has been lost and skewed over time. Learn to love in a different way, scope out the person that makes your heart and mind grow, makes you yearn for a tomorrow with them, gives you the desire to show them off every single day, and makes you miss them four times over every time you say “good night.” Find someone who makes you want to feel and be in love, not just stand awkwardly in the presence of it.
Go and grab hold of an old fashioned romance in a new fashion world.